urania: (hug)
I just wanted to say, thank you all so much for your kind comments. They did make me feel less like an asshole. And after pretty much crying all day yesterday just thinking of the poor dog, I feel better today and think it was the right decision. Even though I miss her already. :( I'm just the person who really likes having pets around, so having the flat so empty again (apart from my flatmates of course) is just a bit sad.

Well, but yeah, feeling better... apart from a massive headache. I took some painkillers I got in London last weekend though (maybe I'll write about that later, but there isn't much to tell anyway...), and wow, do they make me feel woozy. It makes me think there's a good reason you can't get codeine painkillers prescription-free in Germany...

:(

Oct. 12th, 2012 03:06 pm
urania: (crying)
I just feel horrible today. I took the dog back to the shelter. And I just feel so bad about it, too. But after having a panic attack yesterday and not properly eating since I got her, I just had to admit that I'm not ready for a dog yet. Maybe in the future sometime, who knows.

I cried pretty much the whole day today, all the way to the shelter and she just kept looking at me as if to ask what was wrong, it really broke my heart. Oh great, now I'm tearing up again. Anyway, I just really hope she gets supernice owners soon. But I just didn't trust myself to try it out much longer. She already got pretty attached and I just feared it'd be worse for her if I kept her for longer only to realise that yeah, I really can't do it. :(

If it had been a cat I would have tried for longer since I know I can live with cats and "get" them, but with a dog it just kind of felt too "risky" in a way.

Well, I guess I'll spend the rest of the day just crying and lying in bed, it's pathetic. But it really just broke my heart.
urania: (scarlett blink)
Sooo, yesterday I got a dog from the shelter and she's really cute and nice and precious, but somehow this is stressing me out so much. :(
She barked twice during the night and that really isn't allowed to happen when you live in a flat. :( And then when I took her shopping today she barked the whole time she had to wait outside. When you live her alone in the flat/a room, she whines a lot. And she seems scared of our kitchen.
I just... I feel so bad and anxious that she would be better of somewhere else and what if I'm a shitty dog owner. I've been so stressed all day today that I can't even eat anything. Argh, I'm just so unsure now. Now we're still in the trial phase, so she isn't my dog yet, and... I just don't know. :( I might have to take her back, and I just feel horrible.
urania: (queen)
Well, well, I meant to write and entry for ages now, but let's be honest, my life was pretty boring the last two months...

Anyway, now I'm done with my internship, and I'm really not as happy about its end as I thought I would be. Don't get me wrong, I really didn't like it there. xD Just... I don't know, maybe I haven't realised it yet that I'm ~free~ now, haha. And I will miss the money. I should really try to find some student job... but first I'll get a dog! And then see how well it copes with being alone? Well, we'll see.

I'm really excited about my future dog already! I've missed having a pet loads. I'm a bit worried because I never had a dog though. But first time for everything, right? And it's not like I'm an irresponsible idiot. xD Even my mother who started out hating the idea has come round to it somewhat. :)

Okay, what else... Oh, right, anyone want a postcard? ;) Next weekend I'll be going to London to visit two friends for a few days, really looking forward to it! So if you like getting postcards as much as I do, feel free to pm me your address. :)

That's it for now~. I swear I'll try updating more often, haha.

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December 2012

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